Sunday, October 23, 2011

Decisions, decisions, decisions

"To get something you never had, you have to do something you never did. When God takes something from your grasp, he's not punishing you, but merely opening your hands to receive something better. "
I received this e-mail tonight, and it struck such a chord with me that I know God is directing my steps yet again. I have struggled over the past months to make a life-altering decision. Is what I am doing with my life where I need to be?
I have always been blessed to hear that small inner voice that directs my steps in the way I should go. Yet this year, more than any other I can remember, I have tried to walk against this voice and stay in the safety of where I have been for many years. I know that through all the times of fortune or trouble, through all the tears of joy or pain, which I have dealt with in my life, God has always been a constant companion and guiding force in each decision I make.
Now, I find myself at a crossroads in my life which if I were younger or wealthier would not cause a moments thought. Yet, at this time in my life I must make a choice to uphold what I believe is right and leave the security of a job I've held for over twenty years and go out on my own searching to become the person I feel God designed me to be.
I have followed my heart in many decisions. Now, I feel is the time I need to leave the security of my professional position and move into the unknown world of what lies ahead. I don't know what that is yet, but I know God will lead me where he wants me to go. I know I will pursue my writing full time. I have been blessed that my first novel has done well. Not that I can live off the proceeds. Yet, I know God has a calling on my life and I must follow it. Every step I take that pulls me away from this decision leaves me empty and a deep ache in my heart. Where will God lead me? I never know, but I do know that wherever he leads, I will follow.
The e-mail continued: "The will of God will never take you where the Grace of God will not protect you."
I know that God will ever watch over us, always meeting our needs, although not always our wants. Believe and know God loves you always and forever just the way you are. Don't be afraid to step up to the challenges that God places in our lives.
Will I leave my job today? No, but through prayer and quietly listening for that small inner voice, I will better understand the path God has laid before. Through the words in this message sent through an e-mail, one of the worries I've allowed myself to wallow in, has been confirmed. I need to lay aside my fears and forge into the unknown wielding my sword and wearing the full armor of God. It's a big, scary world out there... keep me in your prayers!

Every tomorrow has two handles. We can take hold of it by the handle of anxiety, or by the handle of faith. ~Author Unknown
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